Shamonica Magazine

The Oscars are my Superbowl. Ever since I can remember, my family has gathered to watch the ceremonial distribution of the little gold men. It’s treated as a minor holiday, on par with Halloween. We’d crowd into my Grandmother’s living room and holler at the screen like true sportsfans “Oh my God girl! What the [...]

There’s a million reasons we should dislike Daphne Guinness. She’s heir to a vast beer fortune (guess which beer! guess!) in addition to being landed and titled gentry. She subsists on red bull and Ensure shakes and has allegedly exclaimed “I’ll eat when I’m dead.” But the Honorable Daphne Guinness, throughout all of her publicity stunts, [...]

I’ve said it once, and I’ll say it again: Beyoncé give me the chills you guys. Her raw power is undeniably palpable and overwhelming. Don’t believe me? Watch this. Or this. I rest my case. But more recently, I’ve discovered another way that her raw feminine power has overcome and inspired me to feel things [...]

Shit, I remember when we used to spend whole days at the mall just fucking off, sneaking into movies, spraying body shop mango spray, smoking cigarettes in front of Planet Hollywood, and generally trying to be kick-ass hooligans. Ultimately, we’d get caught in the service halls trying to draw a penis on a wall somewhere, [...]